Reenacting Birth With Fruit Snacks

Saw this on Ads of the World and just had to include it on here.

Creepy. General Mills, I can guarantee that’s not what I’d do with a year’s supply of fruit flavored snacks. Gusher juice smoothies would be more my style.

MMA Fighters Lip-Synching Ultra Girly Songs While Ogling Massive Burgers Will Never Not Be Funny

This is a commercial made by Ogilvy Brazil for Burger King’s new Mega BK Stacker. The guy lip-synching is MMA fighter and UFC Champion Anderson Silva. The song he’s lip-synching is “Lovin’ You” by Minnie Riperton. Intrigued? I’ll let you watch.

That’s some advertising there. And considering how fat we are in America, you might wonder why the Mega BK Stacker isn’t available here. Probably because of groups like this. I’m also reminded about a friend of mine and his story about conquering a BK “Ocho Stacker”. Good times.

Commercials I Hate: 5-hour Energy

Tired sucks. Know what else does? This commercial!

Rerun: Trojan Brings The Awkward Vibrations

This was a funny one. Originally written on May 10.

Moving back home after you’ve been on your own in college is a decidedly mixed bag. The negatives are obvious. There’s the stark realization that making it in the real world is more complicated than banging together a paper a few hours before it’s due. There’s the depression that comes with the feeling that all of your friends are doing better things in better places. And most scary is the thought that you’ll be one of those people still living at home when you’re 40.

But there are advantages as well. Since moving back, I’ve rediscovered the joy of eating square meals on a regular basis (and put on a little weight as a result). I’m not paying rent, so I don’t have the periodic panic sessions about if I can afford this month’s expenses. But maybe the most gratifying change has been the ability to have an adult relationship with my parents. Their role is more a friend and mentor now; they try to steer me in the right direction, but let me make my own decisions.

That said, even with a more open relationship, there still are spots of awkwardness, particularly with my mom. Certain TV ads bring this out. I’m not talking about those commercials for ED or Trojan condoms; those have been on for so long that they don’t even register anymore. I’m more talking about this.

I had seen this one before, so when it came on and my mom was in the room, I was smart enough to change the channel. Really it’s not that notable, except for one part. The acting of the women is quite cheesy, but I think that’s to be expected. But one word brings this makes this commercial ridiculous: Su-weeet! There’s even a chopped and screwed type remix on YouTube.

So why does this guy think his woman’s new trifecta of gifts is so su-weeet? Maybe he just doesn’t like spending time in that area. Maybe he’s happy that she’ll have something to do when he’s out icing his bros at the local Beef-N-Beer. Maybe he’s secretly gay. Maybe the couple is into something a little freaky-dekey that I didn’t want to think about but just did (ew). But seriously, it’s a VIBRATOR dude. It probably means you’re not doing something right. If my girlfriend or wife was that excited about getting a Vibrating Triphoria, I would likely spend the next few hours on Google, trying to get better at the good stuff. But that’s just my opinion. And I’m single, so what the hell do I know?

What’s That Song? Part VIII

Artist: Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros, Song: “Home”

Dude, how bleak would this fall be without the NFL? I mean, I love baseball and college football. But college football still has the crappy BCS and baseball this year doesn’t have many interesting pennant races. So it’s sweet to have the NFL, despite being a Bengals fan. The NFL does a great job marketing itself, as it does with this commercial. And the song is pretty catchy too.

Artist: Lenny Kravitz, Song: “Rock Star City Life”

Lenny Kravitz is still around? He still sucks. And his songs all sound the same, which especially isn’t a compliment when you suck.

Singing Animals: +1 For Geico

Loving this campaign. And here’s another spot. Hit it, Mr. Butters!

Many ads are funny, but this is one of the relatively few that made me laugh out loud. A bird and a dog performing “Take On Me“, an iconic song of the ’80s. It’s bizarre, but wow does it work. And if the blandly dressed woman thinks downloading music is too expensive, she should try Spotify.

ESPN Shows Men What Not To Do

A few announcements. First, this is the 100th post on Commercial Society. I’m the type who has a habit of starting projects with a lot of enthusiasm, only to abandon them quickly with equal enthusiasm, so I’m glad that I’ve been doing this for almost 4 months and 100 posts. Second, I’m shortly going to reach 3,000 pageviews. So thank you for reading, and if you haven’t been reading, you probably should.

One of the most interesting aspects about being a sports fan is considering WHY you’re actually such a big fan. Jerry Seinfeld once said that rooting for a team is really like rooting for clothes. In a sense he’s right, but there’s so much more than that. Sports teams bring pride (though sometimes shame), and a feeling of identity to their supporters. Life is transitory. Most people live in different places and friendships/relationships will often come and go. A team might be the only constant over a lifetime. In 2004, I was a college freshman in the Boston area. That year, the Boston Red Sox won the World Series for the first time since 1918. Near school, there was a cemetery which I occasionally walked through. In the weeks after they won, there was a lot of Red Sox World Champions memorabilia on and around gravestones. It was a way of saying “the Red Sox finally did it, and I wish you were there to see.” That’s what being a fan means.

But as serious as fandom can be, there’s one situation where it shouldn’t be involved.

Funny. All her life, the woman has been talking and dreaming about the perfect proposal. When her Jimmy Fallon lookalike boyfriend (intentional?) finally pops the question, it’s on the Jumbotron at a baseball game. She says “sure”, but her face says it all. Guys, step it up. I know Detroit isn’t the world’s greatest place, but surely there’s a better place to propose than at Comerica Park in front of 40,000 people. Of course, this happens all the time to the point where it’s cliche. Another downside is that it puts a huge amount of pressure on the woman to say yes. Otherwise, both man and woman end up appearing idiotic, like these poor people (the second link is amazing, since the announcer is joking about the woman saying no right before it happens). So propose somewhere more meaningful, more intimate, and more private. Just remember, the Jumbotron is for cheesy dancing, not cheesy proposals.

Ooma: A Goofily Named Phone Service

This commercial isn’t the least bit interesting. But I saw it with no sound while on a treadmill at the gym. I looked and thought “coma”? Very strange name for a phone service. What would their slogan be? “Bills so small, you won’t even be aware of their existence”? Then I looked again, and alas, it’s Ooma.

A Cynicism-Free Moment About Washington’s Newest Memorial

I’m a very cynical person. With the current economic/political/environmental/social climate, I think it’s pretty hard NOT to be cynical and/or angry. But here’s something good. On August 28, the Martin Luther King, Jr. National Memorial will be dedicated in Washington DC. A fitting tribute to a truly revolutionary man, and a monument I definitely want to visit the next time I get to Washington. I won’t even be cynical about this commercial message being presented by Chevrolet. On the contrary, it’s actually quite nicely done.

Subway Reminds Us That Grease Is Delicious

The Subway Oven Crisp Chicken Sub looks decent. But now I really want some greasy food. And yes, that is a lot of grease in the commercial.

Bonus links: Two reviews. Not impressive. Looks like you might be better off with the fried stuff.

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